I REALIZED THIS MORNING WHEN YOU WERE TALKING THAT I AM A FIGHTER, BUT I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING EXCEPT FIGHTING, THAT UNFORTUNATELY I AM A PROUD FIGHTER — AND EVEN WORSE, THAT I LOVE FIGHTING. I LOVE TO STAND IN THE FACE OF THE STRONGEST STORM AND LAUGH. IT IS GREAT JOY. I DON'T LIKE TO LIE IN THE SUN AND MELT. AND YET BEHIND MY MIND, MY HEART LONGS TO MELT. IT YEARNS, BUT IT NEVER SEEMS TO HAVE EVEN A FIGHTING CHANCE. HOW CAN I SALVAGE MY BEING?
There is no problem in it.
If you feel you are a fighter, if you enjoy fighting, not only that, if you are proud of being a fighter — then relax. Fight totally!
Then don't fight your fighting nature. That will be let-go for you.
It is perfectly beautiful to stand before the strongest storm and laugh. Don't feel guilty.
Just try to understand one thing: when I say let-go, I don't mean you have to change anything. I simply mean, whatever you feel you are, just allow it its totality.
Be a fighter with your whole being, and in this totality you will find the melting of the heart. That will be the reward of your being total. You do not need to do anything for it; rewards come on their own. Just be total in anything that you feel you love, that you feel proud of — just be total in it.
Don't create a split. Don't be half and half; don't be partial.
If you are total, one day — standing against the strongest storm, laughing — you will suddenly feel your heart melting in the sun. That will come to you as a reward.
Man unnecessarily creates problems. I want you to understand that there are no problems in life except those you create. Just try to see: whatsoever feels good for you is good. Then go the whole way. Even if the whole world is against it, it doesn't matter. And whether you have gone total and whole will be decided by the reward.
If you start feeling at one point a sudden melting then you know that you have not cheated yourself, that you have been sincere, true. That now is really the point where you can be proud.
OSHO