Life is not all roses, and we have been brought up with that idea, so whenever we come against thorns, we cannot cope with them. We are all like green plants, very tender, protected, brought up in a hothouse. So when we come into the world and it is very hot and there is much struggle and it is not so protective as your family or people who have always been with you, then two things are possible. Either one starts withdrawing from the world — lives in the world but in a withdrawal, closed, so that one becomes a cocoon, closed into oneself . . . .
That's what has happened to many people. They move with their walls around them so that nobody can hit them, nobody can shock them. They avoid all situations where any shock may be possible, but then a person starts dying. because the whole of life is shocking.
If you love somebody there is a possibility of fight, struggle, conflict, but if you are too afraid of conflict, you will never love, and you will miss a great benediction. If you want to relate to people, there is always a possibility that there will be some conflict; you can be hit at. So don't relate — just move politely, formally; never relate deeply with anybody. But then you've missed the whole life and the whole purpose of it. Then you live in your grave. One should be vulnerable and one should be able to face everything that life makes available. Death is also part of it.
I know it brings sadness, but that's how it is. If you want to be happy, you have to accept sadness too. The only way not to be sad is not to ask for happiness. Then you are neither sad nor happy — but you are dead.
As I feel it, it has been a very good experience for you. Something has shattered, you are shaken, but it is good. It will give you a new upsurge of energy. You will come out of it stronger. It has been a good experience.
OSHO
