It is a just a natural phenomenon — the soft wins, and the woman is a softer element than the man. Hard elements have their own use, but as far as the final victory is concerned it is the soft.
Of course you cannot defeat a man if he is also feminine — a buddha cannot be defeated by a woman, impossible, because a buddha is more feminine than any woman. Lao Tzu cannot be defeated, he is more humble than any woman.
If you want to win according to Lao Tzu you should be soft, humble, non-resisting.
THAT-WHICH-IS-WITHOUT-FORM
PENETRATES THAT-WHICH-HAS-NO-CREVICE;
Even if a granite rock has no crevice the water will penetrate it, it will go through it — because it has no form. Water is so humble that you can give it any form and it is always ready to take that shape, that form. You put it in a glass, it becomes the glass; you put it in a bucket, it becomes the bucket. It never resists, never cries, never complains, never protests
OSHO