In the night, before going to sleep, I practice another technique in which I have to lie down on my bed, relax my body, close my eyes and be watchful inside to experience the shift of consciousness from so-called awakening to sleep. I have to witness how sleep takes over.
I go on doing it for a couple of months but fail. Every morning, I realize, I have missed the point again. But one amazing thing has happened.
Whenever I start dreaming, I immediately wake up with the awareness that the thinking process has started. I talk to Osho about it. He says, “It is a great achievement also. In sleep, if you can wake up when dream starts, you can do the same in so-called waking state.” He asks me to continue the technique and explains how the seeker has to work with himself like a scientist working in a laboratory. The seeker’s laboratory is inside, where he has to work alone and has to be patient with himself. It is not an easy task like putting off your clothes. It is more like peeling off your own skin.
Then, after a moment of silence, He adds, “I was not so fortunate like you. I had no master, I had worked alone. But you are fortunate to have a master who can guide you.”
Seeing me serious, He laughs and says, “Never be serious about meditation, but be sincere and playful. Don’t do it for achieving anything, just enjoy doing it.” I listen to His words, which are coming from silences of His loving heart, which knows nothing but compassion.