Whenever you enter into meditation the first man you will find on the gate, the moment you open the door, will be the devil, because it is in fear of him you have closed the door. And remember… but first I will tell you an anecdote, then you will understand.
In a shop they had declared a special concession for Christmas, particularly for ladies' clothes and dresses, so there was a crowd of ladies. One man had come because his wife was ill, and she forced him to go because this was not a chance to be lost. So he stood, gentlemanly, for one hour, but he couldn't reach the counter.
You know ladies, their way — screaming, shouting at each other, moving from anywhere, no queue; and the man was thinking of a queue, so he stood. When one hour passed and he was nowhere near the counter, then he started shoving and shouting and screaming, and he started forcibly to enter the crowd and reach the counter.
One old lady shouted, 'What! What are you doing? Be a gentleman!'
The man said, 'For one hour I have been a gentleman. Now I must behave like a lady! Enough!'
Remember, the devil never behaves like a gentleman, he behaves like a lady. He is always first in the queue. And God is a gentleman. It is difficult for him to be first in the queue and the moment you open the door, the devil enters. And because of your fear of him, you remain closed. But if the devil cannot enter, God also cannot. When you become vulnerable, you become vulnerable for both God and the devil — light and dark, life and death, love and hate — you become available for both opposites.
You have chosen not to suffer, so you are closed. You may not be suffering but your life is a boredom, because although you don't suffer as much as you will suffer if you are open, there is no blessing either. The door is closed — no morning, no sun, no moon enters, no sky enters, no fresh air, everything has gone stale. And in fear you are hiding there.
It is not a house where you are living; you have already converted it into a grave. Your cities are graveyards, your houses are graves. Your whole way of life is that of a dead man.
Courage is needed to be open — courage to suffer, because blessing only becomes possible then.
OSHO
