With friends we should share everything, particularly those moments which are beautiful — moments of love, moments of poetry, moments of music… they should be shared.
In this way your life will become more and more rich. You may become so attuned to each other that you live your whole life together, but there is no marriage.
Jealousy will persist as long as marriage remains the basic foundation of society.
Just give the man, with your full heart, absolute freedom. And tell him he need not hide anything: "To hide anything is insulting. That means you don't trust me." And the same has to happen to man, that he can say to his wife: "You are as independent as I am.
We are together to be happy, we are together to grow into more blissfulness. And we will do everything for each other but we are not going to be jailers to each other." Giving freedom is a joy, having freedom is a joy.
You can have so much joy, but you are turning that whole energy into misery, into jealousy, into fight, into a continuous effort to keep the other under your thumb.
The poets, the painters, the dancers, the musicians, the actors — you will find these people more loving but their love is not focused on individuals.
They are more loving but to as many individuals as they come in contact with. They are the intelligent people, they are our creative part.
Idiots don't want to change anything. They are afraid of change because any change means you will have to learn something again.
The idiot wants to learn something once and remain with it his whole life. It may be a machine, it may be a wife, it may be a husband — it does not matter.
You have known one woman, you know her nagging, you have become accustomed… sometimes not only accustomed, you have become addicted too.
If suddenly your woman does not nag you, you will not be able to sleep that night — what happened? What has gone wrong?
Two persons living together in love should make it a point that their relationship is continuously growing, bringing more flowers every season, creating more joys.
Just sitting together silently is enough….
But all this is possible only if we drop the old idea of marriage. More than friendship is unnatural. And if marriage is stamped by the court, is killed under that stamp in the court…. You cannot bring love under the rule of law.
Love is the ultimate law. You just have to discover its beauties, its treasures. You have not to repeat, parrot-like, all the great values which make man the highest expression of consciousness on this planet. You should exercise them in your relationship.
And this has been my strange experience: if one partner starts moving on the right lines, the other follows sooner or later. Because they both are hungry for love, but they don't know how to approach it.
No university teaches that love is an art and that life is not already given to you; that you have to learn from scratch.
And it is good that we have to discover by our own hands every treasure that is hidden in life… and love is one of the greatest treasures in existence.
But instead of becoming fellow travellers in search of love, beauty and truth, people are wasting their time in fighting, in jealousy.
Just become a little alert and start the change from your side — don't expect it from the other side. It will begin from the other side too. And it costs nothing to smile, it costs nothing to love, it costs nothing to share your happiness with somebody you love.
OSHO
